Men Should Stop Acting Like Sleazy, Sex-Crazed Animals and Women Might Look at Them Again…..

For those of you female party-goers out there, I’m sure you’ve come across the following scenario at one point or another:

You’ve decided to take a retreat away from the daily frustrations of life and pursue a joyful night of gallivanting with your girlfriends. You’re out to just have some fun, sip a few drinks over gossipy conversation and then maybe get your groove on for a bit. The second you hit the dance floor, low and behold, there they are; men standing around you like hyenas waiting to pry on their next “piece of ass” for the night. No matter how much disinterest you show them, it doesn’t matter. In their minds, you ignoring them somehow translates into that you would like to have them ravenously tear your clothes off as soon as possible, or some equally demented idea. They stalk you like predators from behind and then go in for “the move.” What’s that? Oh, come on, you know. It’s the infamous walk up from behind you and attempt to “grind” by putting their arms around your waist and sweeping you towards their probably HIV infected tentacles of doom, I’ll refer to it as. To make it worse, the guy who does it is usually the one wearing an old stained t-shirt and smells like rotten fish. You subsequently slap the bastard in the face and push him off you, feeling violated, and your night of gallivanting has turned into a night of face-offs…literally.

Common scene? Yes, I see it every time I go to the nightclubs and I’m completely disgusted and grossed out by this. When men behave in such a way, it’s a disgrace and makes us all look bad. Now, let me point out that not all men act like this. Some men, ahem, like me, actually respect a woman’s personal space and will only dance with her if she’s CLEARLY invited him to come do so.

But in recent times, I’ve seen an influx of men who act in the way that I described earlier—sex crazed animals. And when I say animals, I am metaphorically referring to the unavoidable realization I had a while ago that most men have very poor personal hygiene habits. Their houses are usually filthy with trails of beer cans and leftover food everywhere. The bathrooms tend to still have used toilet paper on the floor and it smells like a shit factory or worse. They don’t care about dressing up for the ladies and are just lazy in general. Once again, not all men are like this thankfully, but so many of them are.

I’m baffled as to what started this trend in men, but maybe it has something to do with the stereotype that if men clean themselves too much then that is somehow considered to be girly? I’m, sorry I just don’t understand the dimwitted thinking behind notions such as the latter. Fuck what everyone else thinks, I’m happy to be the guy that cleans myself meticulously several times per day. I know one thing, the ladies appreciate it. Who cares what the other guys think? I certainly don’t.

Everything is a competition in the male world, and the amount of women a guy has slept with seems to be of astronomical importance. Men will totally get in each others’ faces about this, and have conversations regarding it which actually make me feel stupider after hearing. They’ll even have sex with their best friend’s love interest or girlfriend just to prove a point, and I’ve seen it many times.

My favorite thing in the entire world, though, is when I show these bastards how being polite and genuine goes a long way. While all these other guys are waxing their junk, coming up with ill-motived, pathetic plans of having a one-night-stand, I simply say a friendly hello to the woman I fancy. I nonchalantly ask her interesting questions about herself and get her to laugh by identifying similarities between the two of us through REAL conversation. By then, she’s gotten to know me, usually dances with me for a bit, and then we exchange phone numbers.

The men look at me with their jaw dropped. They cannot STAND to see some skinny guy like me come out of nowhere and outsmart them in their own environment. But what it comes down to, really, is that I was just being myself. I don’t have ulterior motives; I just like meeting women and being social. I like having a good time by staying true to my character. If men could drop the fake macho, stand around the room with their arms crossed, toolish Ed-Hardy t-shirt look and actually be normal gentlemen, then I think going out could be much more enjoyable for both men and women alike.



Posted on January 24, 2014, in Daily Rantings and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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